First Comes Love Then Comes Marriage Then Comes Ashley With...??

A baby carriage right? My name is Ashley. Im 26 years old and this is my story. I met Brett when i was 14 years old. He was my first kiss and my first crush. At such a young age getting married to him was the last thing on my mind. All through high school we were best friends. After school we lost touch for a couple of years. But eventually fate brought us together again! We dated for two years before we got engaged and after a year of being engaged we got married! We lived in my parents house for a year while they lived out of state and then bought a house of our own a year ago! We knew we wanted kids but we wanted to do things the right way (to our standards) We thought ok we will get married first, get a place of our own, and become financially stable before we have a baby. After we bought our house we threw the idea of having a baby around and decided to enjoy each other and our new home for awhile! But after only three months in our house we were ready! It was sooo exciting after that first month I couldnt wait to take a pregnancy test! Right away we were picking out baby names and picking out what the room would look like if it were a boy or girl!! Of course I couldnt wait to take a pregnancy test! So i got one that tells you six days early! So Brett with video camera and digital camera in tow waited for me outside the bathroom door. As we sat there waiting for the result talking about how our lives were about to change the result came back negative. It took me off gaurd, I had never even thought about the results going that way. But i didnt let it get to me all that much I convinced myself that I had either taken the test to early or we would just get the result we wanted the next month. Little did I know we would relive this day over and over again for the next 13 months! After the first month i went to my doctor and she told me everything looked fine and that it took normal healthy couples months to concieve and to just keep trying. This made me feel better and we did what she said. After three months of trying Bretts work dropped there entire companys health insurance. We talked about if we should continue trying without insurance and decided to do so. After six months of trying I made an appointment with a sliding pay doctors office. They told me the same thing as my original doctor,to keep trying( this phrase infuriated me at this point! It seemed to be the only answer anyone had) and that everything looked fine and that they could not do any further testing until we were trying for at least twelve months. By this time I have become depressed. Staying to myself, pushing my friends and family away, and consuming my life with all things baby. I had looked at every possible website on infertility and how to up your chances of becoming pregnant. I didnt talk to very many people about this because in a way I was ashamed for some reason but mainly me and Brett wanted to surprise our family with a pregnancy.  It seemed as if everyone around me was pregnant! Everyday I would hear of someone else getting pregnant and I would get soo jealous! I hated that I felt that way but I couldnt help it. Then I would hear of someone in highschool getting pregnant or someone that couldnt financially take care of a child and instead of thinking "How can I help them" I would think "I wonder if they will give us there baby!" I started to feel crazy for thinking this way! I just became more depressed! Not wanting to get out and do anything or really talk to anyone. Finally when the twelve months came around I was back into the doctor. They told me they had to rule Brett out first before they could do any testing on me and that they didnt do that type of stuff at there office. They reffered us to another doctor specializing in fertility. The cost of the appointment for just Brett is outrageous!!! Ironically  at home I started making baby items as a hobby to fill my time. I started to post them to facebook and people were actually intersted in buying them! LIGHTBULB!!!!!!! I then decided that every dollar I make selling baby items would go to our fertility appointment! Last week I took an in home fertility test and it came back saying my FSH levels are low, which means I am not producing many if any eggs! So two days ago we started taking Fertilaid! We will see if this works! If not our first fertility appointment will be in September! Fertility issues has caused heart ache and devastation in my life over the past year! It has caused me to be depressed and has put a strain on my marriage! Holding it all in was the worst thing I could have done! This story does not end with an IM PREGNANT! I cant say that im not still depressed and withdrawn! But I can say that I have faith in God and hope in my heart! I hope if you are reading this and that you are going through a similar situation you know your not alone! Dont hold it all in! Find an outlet to let it all out! Have faith in God he will carry you through anything and does not give you anything you are not strong enough to handle! So as far as my journey.... it is a to be continued! Thanks for taking the time to read my story!